Don’t stand so close to me (cos you’re a twat)

Posted on December 3, 2009 
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As mentioned on the fabulous Non-Working Monkey blog, there is a Facebook page you must join in the name of all that is good. Come and feast your eyes on pictures of Sting looking like a twat

Recently saw the aforementioned on The Culture Show re-discovering his folk roots, or returning to his true musical love, or paying respect to the music of his forefathers or whatever reason he’s giving for pretending to like folk music, by playing an acoustic guitar and singing in a bar with some proper folkies (Kathryn Tickell for one). Things is, when they zoomed in on his moody mug, he appeared to be using in-ear monitors, the fancy-pants headphones you wear on stage to hear yourself over the noise of big amps and drum kits and fifty thousand adoring fans screaming your name. Not something that has any place in an empty bar when playing with other, unamplified musicians.

Unless of course you’re an egotistical rock star completely out of touch with reality.

And a twat.

Ewa Woo Wa Awa’

Posted on November 19, 2009 
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Sad to hear that Edward Woodward has died. I used to LOVE “The Equalizer” as a kid but his place in my heart comes from his performance as Neil Howie in “The Wicker Man”, one of my all time favourite films. I could write reams about how and why it’s a great film, but Woodward is the key to it. His performance as the outsider trying to worm his way into an island community he can’t begin to understand is still stunning today.

I’ve been listening to the soundtrack (which i also recommend) and was slightly disturbed to hear the following:-

“How a maid can milk a bull
and every stroke a bucketful”

good lord.

… and what ever comes my way

Posted on November 10, 2009 
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“You’re turning right!”

“Yes, yes, I HAD remembered to signal, I was just waiting until I was past that other entrance as it can be very confusing to other road users and/or pedestrians. It’s important to be considerate and clear in your signalling to avoid confusion. As an experienced driver, I’d really have expected you to know that”

“indeed. And you’re signalling left because … ?”

“bollocks”

Fiona was “quite keen” for me to share in the driving. Having passed my test 10 years ago and driven about 4 times since, at least 3 of which were in a car with the steering wheel on the wrong side, I decided to have some lessons first.

They went surprising well, the last one actually involving a jaunt on the motorway where I hardly cried at all. Since then, I’ve been tootling around Chorlton and Sale and even did some of the windy, fiddly bits in Yorkshire. Fiona seems to be loving it, too. Whenever I’m driving, she grips the door-handle in excitement, emitting little screams of delight and keeps her eyes wide, wide open so as not to miss any of the scenery.

I’m not planning to buy a car, but I did have a look at some second-hand one on a few websites. Being me, I got distracted and ended up trying to decide whether I would rather have a Tank or a fire engine. Or a cadillac.

Wonder how much the batmobile would cost … ?

Howzat!

Posted on August 11, 2009 
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A Century, eh? (that and Howzat are the only Cricket terms I know, hence the title)

This is my 100th post. I’ve been trying to think of something big to say but can’t really come up with anything so … Woo Hoo!

back to posting shortly …

Head in the clouds and a mouthful of pie

Posted on June 12, 2009 
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Oooooo it’s been AGES since I put anything on here. Got busy at work, then lazy at night and it’s just slipped away from me. I’ve been putting off writing anything until I had something momentous to say, but that’s never going to happen, so I’m checking in again just to stop this dying off.

Excitingly, the next post will be my hundredth so i’ll need to actually write something interesting for that. Or at least something with some actual content.

Any suggestions?

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