“You’re turning right!”

“Yes, yes, I HAD remembered to signal, I was just waiting until I was past that other entrance as it can be very confusing to other road users and/or pedestrians. It’s important to be considerate and clear in your signalling to avoid confusion. As an experienced driver, I’d really have expected you to know that”

“indeed. And you’re signalling left because … ?”

“bollocks”

Fiona was “quite keen” for me to share in the driving. Having passed my test 10 years ago and driven about 4 times since, at least 3 of which were in a car with the steering wheel on the wrong side, I decided to have some lessons first.

They went surprising well, the last one actually involving a jaunt on the motorway where I hardly cried at all. Since then, I’ve been tootling around Chorlton and Sale and even did some of the windy, fiddly bits in Yorkshire. Fiona seems to be loving it, too. Whenever I’m driving, she grips the door-handle in excitement, emitting little screams of delight and keeps her eyes wide, wide open so as not to miss any of the scenery.

I’m not planning to buy a car, but I did have a look at some second-hand one on a few websites. Being me, I got distracted and ended up trying to decide whether I would rather have a Tank or a fire engine. Or a cadillac.

Wonder how much the batmobile would cost … ?